My 5 Question Interview

Questions from Big Gay Jim.

1. Describe your most amazing play/shot/move/moment from the handball courts.

This is tough for me to describe for a couple of reasons. One, being somewhat of a humble fellow, I try to brag as little as possible. Two, the games tend to be so fast it's difficult to fully visualize certain moments that may have looked awesome or incredible to the other players on the court. With that said, I think it is safe to say that my signature handball move is "The Kong." "The Kong shot" is my patented right-handed & backwards return shot along the left wall. The reason for its existence is my reluctance to fully incorporate my left hand into my game. But I am getting better in that regard. There have been a handfull of occasions, when I have either busted out "The Kong" or managed to dig out a return that seemed nonreturnable, and I recall other players vocalizing their disbelief (Flynn). ;) My "around the world" serve also comes to mind.

2. Being a male of the species, you screw something up big time. What fabulously romantic thing do you do for Tara to say “I’m sorry, please don’t kill me?”

LOL! I can't tell you how many times I've been in this situation. Honestly, there is not "one" thing I do. I screw up enough to have several "sorry tactics" in my repertoire. These include massages, cuddles, head-pets, puchases of ice-cream, flowers, choclates, etc. However, the ace up my sleeve is my patented, uber-cute look, that no woman can resist. With that said, I have to say that women have their fair share of "I'm sorry, please don't kill me" moments as well. ;)

3. (In simulated locker room jargon:) Dude, we know you’re not. But, like...huh…if you were, what dude would you pick? (I can speak jock, but I’m not fluent.)

If I were ever to go gay, it would be for you Jimmy Bear! ;) Although honestly? I just can't bring myself to find manly men attractive. A man would have to have feminine traits in order for me to take note of them. One person does come to mind, Angle from Rent. I remember saying to Tara once, while we were watching the movie, "Damn, that man is fine!"

P.S. Jim, don't worry about not being fluent in "jock speak." Even as a straight man, I don't speak it well either.

4. After winning the lottery, you must select the two bands that will play your birthday concert. Ignoring the laws of time and space and assuming death or band break ups are trivial details, who plays and why?

First Band(s): Tool & A Perfect Circle, hands down. I was exposed to both of these bands in college and have never looked back. They make the only music that I can listen to non-stop and never get tired of. The music from each of these bands is meditative, introspective, intelligent, aggressive, harmonious, hypnotic, and beautiful, all at the same time. I am counting these two bands as one, given that Maynard James Keenan is involved with both of them.

Second Band: Pete Yorn. This underrated musician has been a sentimental favorite of mine since college as well. I have grown more fond of his music over the years as it has been playing in the car during several road trips and vacations with my wife, Tara. The mix CD we have of his music is one of our favorite traveling CDs, if not THE favorite.

5. If you were a super hero, what would your powers be…and describe your costume (realizing that spandex is required and non-negotiable)?

WOW! What an amazing, fantastic, incredible, super, and uncanny question! ;)

Gee, what does one gauge one's response on? Sheer strength? Telepathic or telekinetic abilities? Keen detection skills? Regenerative capabilities? To be honest, I think there are a plethora of super powers that I would go for. However, in the case of making things interesting, I would choose to have control over the elements. I think it would be bad-ass to have the power of earth, fire, water, & wind, all at my fingertips. Costume-wise, think a masculine version of Storm from the X-men, but just as dead-hot-sexy. I would go for either a blue, silver, or black spandex suite or a combination of those colors. No worries ladies and gents, the spandex would be plenty tight.